It’s been tough.

This summer I did something a little different than the past, I worked at a camp – Pine Cove for 5 weeks and trained for 2 weeks as a photographer.  It was crazy hard work, but an awesome environment.  I had heard nothing but good things from people who worked at Pine Cove, so I had high expectations and was super excited.  Unbeknownst to me, this would be 7 total weeks that I absolutely dread.  Funny how every single person said they loved this camp, but as I served there I didn’t.  There were night that I cried in my car because I didn’t want to be there.  When someone finally asked me why I was so unhappy about being there, I literally couldn’t say a thing. People were so caring, intentional, and Christ-Centered, how could I hate it?  After a few days of intense heart searching, God revealed to me that I was serving the people and not the Lord.  I was so wrapped up in making things run smoothly, impressing people with pictures, and not messing up that I had been working – not serving.  I felt like the 5 weeks of camp had been a waste. How could I be so selfish?  When I started to understand what God was doing in heart, the Enemy began quickly to grab hold of my mind.  I felt like I had let a bunch of people down.  I felt unworthy to God’s sweet grace and mercy.  That’s when the Lord revealed Psalm 100 to me.  I read it over and over again and the words, “It is HE who made us”.  Had I forgotten that God MADE me?  Had I forgotten that I was at camp for a REASON?  It was comforting to be reassured that I was worthy, I was special in God’s eyes. How sweet His mercy is, and how crazy my camp experience was!  I am so thankful for Pine Cove Camps, every staff member there loved the Lord more than anything and put others before themselves.  Each person was blessing from the Lord and I had not realized it until after I left camp. But I thank God for the hard days so that I may learn something awesome in the end!